CityHangover Guestblog, Vol V
There are rules. As well as previous Guestblogs: I, II, III, IV. And with that, I turn it over to my double-crossing sister, who despite her well chronicled exploits made for a great travel partner.
I’m Bringin’ Guestblogs Back...
Although I was nearly booted from the family due to my extracurriculars on the first night of my travels, I am honored to be able to write a guest blog chronicling my holiday with the infamous CJB. Being the youngest, and the only girl, the big bro has always sort of had me under his wing. Usually his influence comes out in discussions about my career (I need to get out of Michigan – okay, I get it), but on this occasion, it was the “What do you want to learn from this trip?” conversation on day 2 that really took the cake. Call me stupid, but I was looking at the trip solely as a break from work, not an experience that would change my life intellectually. Looking back now, however, whether I was trying to or not, I actually did learn a few things from my trip. Sure, they might not be as deep as the lessons CJB had envisioned for me, but they taught me something valuable nonetheless.
Lesson 1: Italy can’t refuse the charm of a bright eyed, small town, American girl. Evelyn, our inn keeper, or more appropriately, our house mother during our stay in Florence, was intent on ensuring that big bro took good care of me while we were on our trip; she greeted us with a cheerful “Bonjourno” every time she buzzed us in and, when we left, instructed the big bro to bring me home safely at the end of the night (to which he later replied to me, still quite irritated, “If she only knew…”).
Lesson 2: Rome is indeed the city of romance, just as I’d always heard.
Not that I’m entirely against romance and affection, but given the number of old couples we spotted making out in open areas throughout the week (that’s right, people, the over 50 crowd), I think they should put some restrictions on the PDA. CJB, on the other hand, seemed amused by all of this necking, exclaiming in reference to one older couple, “Oooh…look, they’re at it again.”
Lesson 3: It’s completely acceptable – and common – for women in Europe to date shorter men.
So…I guess there’s hope for me after all, if I’m up for moving across the ocean and trading my desire for an athlete for a guy who carries a Gucci man purse and prefers a Vespa over an Escalade. We might have to save this option for one of those if-I’m-thirty five-and-not-yet-married sort of things.
Lesson 4: When it comes to flying, if you’re too poor for first class, the emergency exit row is the way to go.
This position on the plane offers plenty of leg room (read: an increased opportunity for sleep), provided that you’re willing to accept the responsibility that comes with the position and live without your possessions for a good chunk of the flight. Not that anyone has ever actually survived a water landing, but we obliged with the flight attendant’s instructions to put everything of ours in the overhead compartment (magazines, books, water bottles, etc) so that if we did crash, our aisle would be clear enough for us to make history by saving everyone on the plane.
Lesson 5: If you’re going to do something stupid on your trip, do it on the last day rather than the first.
That’s right, ladies and gents, I saved the best for last. This might go without saying, but I think it’s imperative to remember, especially if your travel partner is CJB, the man notorious for always getting the last word in and never letting others live things down.
I’m Bringin’ Guestblogs Back...
Although I was nearly booted from the family due to my extracurriculars on the first night of my travels, I am honored to be able to write a guest blog chronicling my holiday with the infamous CJB. Being the youngest, and the only girl, the big bro has always sort of had me under his wing. Usually his influence comes out in discussions about my career (I need to get out of Michigan – okay, I get it), but on this occasion, it was the “What do you want to learn from this trip?” conversation on day 2 that really took the cake. Call me stupid, but I was looking at the trip solely as a break from work, not an experience that would change my life intellectually. Looking back now, however, whether I was trying to or not, I actually did learn a few things from my trip. Sure, they might not be as deep as the lessons CJB had envisioned for me, but they taught me something valuable nonetheless.
Lesson 1: Italy can’t refuse the charm of a bright eyed, small town, American girl. Evelyn, our inn keeper, or more appropriately, our house mother during our stay in Florence, was intent on ensuring that big bro took good care of me while we were on our trip; she greeted us with a cheerful “Bonjourno” every time she buzzed us in and, when we left, instructed the big bro to bring me home safely at the end of the night (to which he later replied to me, still quite irritated, “If she only knew…”).
Lesson 2: Rome is indeed the city of romance, just as I’d always heard.
Not that I’m entirely against romance and affection, but given the number of old couples we spotted making out in open areas throughout the week (that’s right, people, the over 50 crowd), I think they should put some restrictions on the PDA. CJB, on the other hand, seemed amused by all of this necking, exclaiming in reference to one older couple, “Oooh…look, they’re at it again.”
Lesson 3: It’s completely acceptable – and common – for women in Europe to date shorter men.
So…I guess there’s hope for me after all, if I’m up for moving across the ocean and trading my desire for an athlete for a guy who carries a Gucci man purse and prefers a Vespa over an Escalade. We might have to save this option for one of those if-I’m-thirty five-and-not-yet-married sort of things.
Lesson 4: When it comes to flying, if you’re too poor for first class, the emergency exit row is the way to go.
This position on the plane offers plenty of leg room (read: an increased opportunity for sleep), provided that you’re willing to accept the responsibility that comes with the position and live without your possessions for a good chunk of the flight. Not that anyone has ever actually survived a water landing, but we obliged with the flight attendant’s instructions to put everything of ours in the overhead compartment (magazines, books, water bottles, etc) so that if we did crash, our aisle would be clear enough for us to make history by saving everyone on the plane.
Lesson 5: If you’re going to do something stupid on your trip, do it on the last day rather than the first.
That’s right, ladies and gents, I saved the best for last. This might go without saying, but I think it’s imperative to remember, especially if your travel partner is CJB, the man notorious for always getting the last word in and never letting others live things down.
posted by cjb at 10:09 AM
5 Comments:
CJ and BA,
Allow me to have the honor of the first comment, on the guest blog.
Ba, you took Cj's advice and finally got out of Mi. So for him to refer to you as a floozy, I have to wonder has he been living in his glass house for soo long that the windows are dirty and he can't see that everyone needs a little tlc every now and then? Besides, you were practicing for the city of love, right? I think you got an experience of a life time to go with your mentor and big bro. I have to say again, I'm honored to have you for adopted children and now grown up to help me relive my twentys through your lives. Keep up the good work. I'm enjoying the ride!
Dearest BAB,
You indeed did bring guest blogging back. And despite CJBs desperate attempts to vilify your "life choices," which we can only read as a George W.-like attempt to distract us from the WMDs in his pants, you have shown your true colors as a member of the B clan. We (friends of CJB, and friends is a loose term, imagine us more as spectators in the freak show tent at the circus) are proud of you and your ambitious overseas endeavors. You kept the ridiculous going and that is all we can really ask.
Best,
the Jesus KMV
Senior Jesus,
Wow, what a rousing vote of support for my double crossing sister. I guess I shouldn't be surprised given that you, too, allegedly made moves with one of my co-workers? Then again, you also stole her cell phone...
touche, my friend, touche
BAB, nice guest spot. Let's hope that The Buckets can come through with something worthy of this effort.
The Italy trip and its extracurriculars have been consistently invoked in various contexts. Overall, your legend has grown. As has The Jesus's, easily one of the most popular Americans in London, even when he's not here.
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